School starts this week for our Chiquita #1! It’s preschool, and she only goes twice a week for a few hours, but it still has a surprisingly big impact on our schedule to have to rush out of the house even two mornings a week. Now that we’re getting ready to say goodbye to summer, I realized that I’ve accidentally been doing slow parenting for the past month.
Have you heard of the Slow Parenting movement? I first heard the term a few years ago (I think before I even had any children), but it’s stuck with me ever since. It’s pretty much exactly what it sounds like: slowing down, savoring the moment, doing few activities, letting your kids be still (and potentially be bored).
For the past month, mostly by accident, the girls and I have spent a lot of slow days together. Thanks to friends traveling, the horrific Phoenix heat, and a couple of summer colds, our schedule has been mostly free of play dates or work commitments. Between our normal errands and some fun summer adventures, we’d always get out of the house at least once a day, but in general, thanks to our relatively empty schedule, there were fewer instances of stressed-out rushing (me) and overstimulation (kids).
I loved the advice in this (old) Boston Globe article about slow parenting:
“Slowing down and connecting with each other is about being mindful of what you’re doing. These days when everyone is so busy, we need to be intentional about making space for family time. Like all of our other activities, we need to mark it on the calendar.” – Carrie Contey, cofounder of Slow Family Living
“I encourage parents to take some time to just watch their children, whether they are playing, doing homework, or eating a snack. Take a moment to drink them in. Remember and remind yourself how remarkable your children are. That pause alone, even if momentary, can drive a shift in the pace.” – John Duffy, clinical psychologist and author of “The Available Parent”
That second one really hit home for me, because the greatest gift of our slow parenting summer was the chance to really watch my girls together. The other day I peeked into the living room while my three year old was teaching my one year old how to play ring-around-the-rosie (they included a favorite doll to make the ring bigger). Later that week I stuck them both in the bathtub with paletas, and just watched them. I smiled at how perfectly round the baby’s stomach is, laughed at their tan lines, and admired their long eyelashes. I watched as one took tiny bites of her paleta and the other took long licks, and my heart almost broke thinking of how big they’ll be one day. It was the sweetest moment, but I could have so easily missed it!
Even without kids in “real” school, the necessary tasks of getting two tiny humans dressed and fed so we can do the things we need to do (all scheduled around various naps that need to be taken at the right time) creates a special brand of daily chaos. And for you who have bigger kids, the start of school definitely signals a busier season for everyone. So as we get ready for back to school, I’m committed to keeping some of the principles of slow parenting in mind even when the long days of summer are behind us.
What about you? Do you purposely schedule in slower-paced time with your little ones?
Vanessa,
I loved this post. It’s so true – we are all so connected to technology that oftentimes we miss out on beautiful moments. I try to make it a point to disconnect during bath time and avoid even taking my phone in the room when I’m reading to my son before bedtime.
Ahh that’s a great idea! My goal is to leave my phone in my room all through dinner time, bath time and bedtime! Sometimes I’m successful, sometimes not so much… work in progress 🙂